Scott Adams Writes:

…I want to live in a world where a rock star wondered, ‘How can I make a billion people think about my schlong for a few days’?

Brilliant.

Patrick Combs epic story of bank errors, legal intimidation and the media. A timeless classic. (Also, apparently, a one man show that I’m thinking about trying to see.)

Part I: Depositing the Junk Check
Part II: Getting A Cashier’s Check
Part III: The Bank Freaks Out
Part IV: Learning My Rights
Part V: Beating Fear!
Part VI: Henry Bailey
Part VII: The Waiting>Page 8
Part VIII: Updates
Part IX: Cleaning Up the FICAL matter
Part X: Almost Done
Final Chapter!

My mother sent this to me in an email. I laughed… alot!

WEST MILFORD, N.J. [ AP Photo/SUZANNE GIOVANETTI ] — A black bear picked the wrong yard for a jaunt, running into a territorial tabby who ran the furry beast up a tree - twice.

Jack, a 15-pound orange and white cat, keeps a close vigil on his property, often chasing small animals, but his owners and neighbors say his latest escapade was surprising.

“We used to joke, ‘Jack’s on duty,’ never knowing he’d go after a bear,” owner Donna Dickey told The Star-Ledger of Newark for Friday’s editions.

Neighbor Suzanne Giovanetti first spotted Jack’s accomplishment after her husband saw a bear climb a tree on the edge of their northern New Jersey property on Sunday. Giovanetti thought Jack was simply looking up at the bear, but soon realized the much larger animal was afraid of the hissing cat.

After about 15 minutes, the bear descended and tried to run away, but Jack chased it up another tree.

Dickey, who feared for her cat, then called Jack home and the bear scurried back to the woods.

“He doesn’t want anybody in his yard,” Dickey said.

Bear sightings are not unusual in West Milford, which experts consider one of the state’s most bear-populated areas.

Sandals with a built in bottle opener?!?! I want…No, I NEED these! Not that I get to the beach very often but how cool would it be to be able to slide off your sandal and crack open a nice cold [insert name of favorite bottled beverage here.] (mine would be Stella.) This is such a smack-the-forehead great idea I wonder if it has been done before? Anyway, get on over to DogFunk and get you some. Better yet, Get ME some.

[Via: BoingBoing]

WooHoo!! My favorite US government employee delivered my ValleySchwag package today! I got a great t-shirt from Rubyred labs, stickers from Goatsesighting, Riya, Feedburner and more… (Honestly, I probably wont be using the temporary tattoo. but it’s cool anyway.)

All this otherwise free stuff for only $15 a month! But just think of all the money you’ll save on the airfare of going to all those internet conferences. And it’s still less than just 3 of those triple-venti-half-caff-hazelnut-lattes at Starbucks!

C’mon you know you want one of your very own! Admit it! So get on over to ValleySchwag and sign up for yourself!

The New York Times had a bit on May 12th by Stuart Elliott about how the show Stomp is going to have for one night only (for now, at least) a live advertisement before the evening performance. More details in the article (free sub. required). I don’t know how much a ticket to Stomp costs but a typical broadway ticket is going for $80 to $120. I’m not sure how I would feel being subjected to pre-show ads after paying that much for a ticket.

One of my favorite bands They Might Be Giants has produced some ringtones including one titled “Call Connected by the NSA�.

[via: The social software Weblog (direct to post)]

Geek Rapper MC Plus+’s album Algorhythms is available for download. I heard a track on Adam Curry’s podcast last week but when Crypto-Gram had blurb about it I went to the site and checked it out. I’m not much into rap but you’ve got to give these guys credit. This is pretty good stuff. Here’s a bit obout them from the bio page:

MC Plus+ - MC Plus+ is the founder and indisputably the #1 greatest computer science gangsta rapper ever. He is to CS gangsta rap what a blue screen is to Windows, what Vaseline, maple syrup and sour cream are to a good time. He’s putting CS on the map, producing raps for students from computer science departments around the world. With another 4 years still at Purdue, trying to get that PhD, he has promised to keep producing CS hip-hop for all the grad students in the struggle.

Spill Beers - Claims to be the producer of the album but the only thing we’ve seen him produce is his own beer. He helps with the raps and bitches at the beats. Someone told us he’d worked on a record before, no one told us it was a database record.

Lord Illingworth - He rocks unorthodox in flip-flops and D-latches. He processes you with batches and sons of batches. Lord Illingworth has 24 inch rims on his turntables. All that skratching is making him, well, no, there really isn’t all that much skratching. The one thing that’s certain is that his shit is blowing up, and that’s because he has a spastic colon. Even that won’t stop him. After all, he’s got more beats than a vegetable garden.

(Via Daily Source Code and Bruce Schneier’s Crypto-Gram Newsletter)